ADHD and ME

By Sarah – Living with a mind that never slows down

For most of my life, I thought I was just bad at being human.

Why couldn’t I just focus like everyone else? Why did I forget simple things, speak without thinking, or leave everything half-finished no matter how much I cared?

Growing up with undiagnosed ADHD was like trying to tune into a radio station that never quite came in clearly — constant noise, half-thoughts, emotional highs and lows that nobody else seemed to experience. My brain was always on, but never in the way I needed it to be.

The Daily Battle Nobody Sees

ADHD isn’t just about being "a bit distracted." It’s missing deadlines when I’ve been trying so hard not to. It’s being late again and hating myself for it. It’s walking into a room and forgetting why I’m there — five times a day.

People often assume I’m disorganised or lazy. But the truth is, I’m constantly trying to hold everything together. Reminders on my phone. Lists on every surface. Starting a task with full motivation, then somehow ending up doing three different things and finishing none.

It’s the internal dialogue that’s the hardest. Why am I like this? Why can’t I just do the things I need to do?

ADHD and My Relationships

One of the most painful parts of living with ADHD is how it affects my relationships.

I’ve hurt people without meaning to — forgotten birthdays, missed texts, zoned out during important conversations. Sometimes I over-explain, overshare, or speak too fast. Other times, I go quiet because I feel overwhelmed and don’t know how to express what’s going on in my head.

I've lost friendships, and every time, I ask myself if maybe I’m just too much.

But I’ve also learned that the people who get me — who understand that I’m not flakey or selfish, just wired differently — are the ones worth holding onto

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Working With ADHD Is a Rollercoaster

Work is a mixed bag for me.

When I’m interested in something, I can hyperfocus and create amazing things. But when it comes to routine admin, deadlines, or switching between tasks — I struggle. It’s like my brain just short-circuits.

I’ve had great feedback and big successes… and also forgotten entire meetings, missed emails, and cried in the bathroom more times than I’d like to admit.

Sometimes people say, “But you seem so organised!” And I want to say, You have no idea how hard I’m working just to appear that way.

Finally, a Diagnosis

When I was diagnosed with ADHD, everything changed — and also, nothing changed.

I was still me. But now I had a reason why things had always felt harder. I had words for the chaos and tools to start navigating it. The diagnosis didn’t magically make everything easier, but it gave me permission to stop blaming myself.

I stopped calling myself lazy. I stopped comparing myself to neurotypical people who could plan, focus, and “just get it done.” And I started learning how to support myself, not punish myself.

Finding My Way

Now, I’m learning what works for me.

• Breaking tasks into micro-steps.

• Using timers and visual cues.

• Building movement and rest into my day.

• Letting go of perfection and embracing done.

• Being open with people about how I work best.

And when I mess up — which still happens — I talk to myself like I would to a friend. That has been one of the hardest but most healing lessons.

Living With ADHD Doesn’t Mean Failing

Sure, ADHD brings struggles — executive dysfunction, emotional overwhelm, mental exhaustion. But it also brings creativity, empathy, and a brain that notices the details others miss.

I’m learning to love the way I think. The big ideas. The passion. The resilience that comes from falling behind a hundred times and still trying again.

If You’re Like Me…

If you’re reading this and thinking, this sounds like me, I want you to know:You’re not broken. You’re not lazy. You’re not a failure.

You’re living with a brain that works differently in a world built for sameness. You just need support that works for you, and the self-compassion to keep going — even when it’s hard.

There is no “normal” to catch up to. There is only your way. And your way is valid.

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